I was cleaning up a drawer at my office and I came across this letter that appeared in the Morning Advocate sometime after the Summer of 1984 when we were the University of Louisiana. I have tried to locate the author of this marvelous letter to the editor without success. I trust that he would still be interested in publicizing his creation so I had the article re-typed for inclusion on this board. If anyone knows the author, I think he should be applauded formally on this board.
kawlija1This is a parable about The University of Southwestern Louisiana and Louisiana State University, prepared specially for the home of the paper tiger and gutless legislator. I hope someone finds it enlightening. At least I did, when I moved to Lafayette from Shreveport.
Eric Lee Green
222 Clemantis Corner
Lafayette, LAA PARABLE ABOUT UsL-LSU
Once upon a time there was a young man named Blah. He toiled and struggled to make something out of nothing, and when he paused to examine his handiwork, behold, it was good. And he went out upon the land to persuade others to see his handiwork and buy his crops and invest money for equipment and workers. But no one would come and see, for all knew that a man with a name like Blah could do no good.
Goliath, on the other hand, lived off the fat of the land. He had a privileged life from birth, and luxuriated in the knowledge that he had but to wave his hand and hundreds in the Capitol Building would rush to do his bidding. He had everything; the largest farm, the most crops, the most prestigious reputation. But unknown to the rest of the land, his standards were slowly eroding as he spent more and more money for accountants and managers and less and less money on the purpose of his farm: raising crops.
Blah swiftly grew tired of being shunned, and went to his management board to get a new name, invoking the memories of King Edward's promises to Blah in the recent election. And behold, they named him Unique.
Goliath was frightened. If Blah had a new name like Unique, everyone would come and see his handiwork. And, by some chance someone might compare him with Goliath, and see that while Blah was producing five excellent crops with the least money per acre, Goliath was producing 45 mediocre crops with the most money per acre. People might start asking questions. So Goliath gently waved his hand, and, behold, hundreds in the Capitol did his bidding. And Goliath laughed and mocked young Blah with his power, saying, "Look, I can buy a whole legislature with merely a wave of my hand. What can you offer to compete with that?" And Blah said, "I do my job the best with the least."
And everyone looked the other way when Blah read the Constitution, which had a part in it to keep Goliath from controlling Blah, and Blah filed suit. It languished in court for years, and meanwhile Goliath burned all of Blah's crops and drove away his workers and cattle, in the name of economy. And Blah was once again reduced to licking Goliath's boots and begging Goliath for bread, and the courts pondered whether his name was Blah or Unique, but he knew that he was Unique and Goliath knew he was Unique, so at least he had a little comfort as he waited for Goliath to end his suffering with the guillotine of economic reason.
Eric Lee Green
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