THE TENTH ANNUAL BIRDY AWARDS

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PLAYERS For you newcomers, I do this every year. It's all done in fun. If you get offended, grow up. PLAYER OF THE YEAR--ANTHONY WINCHESTER--WESTERN KENTUCKY We've had good shooters in this league (Eric Channing, Erik Benzel), but Winchester is as good at getting his own shot off the dribble as this league has seen in many years. Handles it well, good rebounder, underrated defensively. The total package for this league. NEWCOMER OF THE YEAR--KENDRICK DAVIS--NORTH TEXAS Some good newcomers this year, including Denver's Walker and UALR's Jones-Jennings, but it's easy to see why Davis started at a bigger school Very good athlete, solid shooter and like Winchester, can create his own shot. FRESHMAN OF THE YEAR--VACATED Someone won this award only because someone had to. Malone won't be confused with previous Frosh winners Winchester, Michael Southall or Courtney Lee. COACH OF THE YEAR---MONTE TOWE--NEW ORLEANS I have no problem with the guy who won it, but let's take a look at Monte Towe. Lost his house. Lost his University. Had to convince his players to relocate 300 miles away. Lost his center (Elias). Lost his point guard (Mcalebb). Lost his leading scorer midway through the season. Yet finished fourth in the West, and had a win in the tournament. We only THINK we know what this guy went through. Amazing job. Just amazing. COMEBACK PLAYER OF THE YEAR--MICHAEL SOUTHALL--LOUISIANA After two years of inactivity, Cajun center came back with a vengeance, dominating most opponents. Finished his career #2 all time shot blocker in Conference history. And, he did it the right way this time, both on the court and in the classroom. Went from being a total waste to a potential NBA player. Robert Lee might have saved this kid's life. BIGGEST JOKE ON THE ALL CONFERENCE TEAM--YEMI NICHOLSON-- DEFENSIVE PLAYER OF THE YEAR. Blocked plenty of shots, but when he didn't, he either got in foul trouble or just stood there and let you score. Southall dunked in his face eight times in one game and Yemi just stood there and took it. Terry Carroll should be reprimanded for nominating him for this award.....which gets Nicholoson the dreaded annual MOST OVERRATED award. Good offensive player. Horrible defender. MOST UNDERRATED PLAYER---RICHARD LAW---SOUTH ALABAMA This kid has never gotten enough credit. Think of him as a poor man's Anthony Winchester. Silent assassin from the outside who also takes it to the basket and rebounds well. Doesn't take a lot of shots, but seems to always make the big ones. BEST ATHLETE--DWAYNE MITCHELL--LOUISIANA I have to go all the way back to Darnell Mee to think of an athlete anywhere close to Mitchell. Also gets the BEST DUNKER award. MOST IMPROVED PLAYER---MARIO JOINTER--SOUTH ALABAMA Went from being just a shooter to a good all around player. Also did it more in the team concept this time around. Pelphrey got his attention and turned him into a total player. BIGGEST SURPRISE---RASHAD JONES-JENNINGS--UALR Come on. Do you really think Steve Shields believed he was signing the nation's 3rd leading rebounder? BIGGEST DISAPPOINMENT--ED TURNER--LOUISIANA Cajuns thought they were getting the league's newcomer. Didn't shoot it, turned it over too much and got suspended twice. Will be interesting to see if Lee brings him back. SPONGE BOB AWARD--DANIEL EMERSON--WESTERN KENTUCKY Dude has the squarest head I've ever seen FUTURE MONSTER AWARD--THERON HUDSON--MIDDLE TENNESSEE He'll be the next dominant big man in this league. TEAMS AND COACHES TOM PETTY FREEFALLIN' AWARD--EAST DIVISION--UALR Lost their last five conference games to finish fourth in the East. Won a game in the tournament then reverted by getting hammered by South Alabama. Wouldn't have won in the tournament if it hadn't been for.......... TOM PETTY FREEFALLIN' AWARD--WEST DIVISION--NORTH TEXAS Started 5-2 in the league and then lost six of seven. Finished it off by losing to East Division Petty Winner UALR. Is this team EVER going to start playing defense???? PHOENIX AWARD--LOUISIANA After starting 1-7 in the league and 5-14 overall, Cajuns finished second in the West and got to the tournament semifinals before giving Western Kentucky all they could handle. BIGGEST IDENTITY CRISIS--NORTH TEXAS If they want to be known as the Mean Green, why is it the only song their band seems to know is "Fly like an Eagle?" TAKE A BOW AWARD--FLORIDA INTERNATIONAL Living up to their name, FIU players use the international tradition of joining hands and bowing to the crowd before each game. YOU GET WHAT YOU PAY FOR AWARD---ARKANSAS STATE Signed Dickey Nutt to a new contract under reduced salary. Arkansas State promptly reduced their number of wins this season. JEKYLL/HYDE AWARD--TROY Made 23 three pointers in their first round game vs. Arkansas State. Made six (one after halftime) in their overtime loss to Louisiana. THE $168,000 MISTAKE AWARD--MIDDLE TENNESSEE Leading by one with 40 seconds left, MTSU passed up a sure layup to bring the ball back out and run clock, even though Denver was guaranteed another possession. Two passes later they turned it over and Denver scored with a second left to win....let's see....7000 people times twelve bucks times two games....yep 168,000 SOMEBODY JUST SHOT MY DOG AWARD---COMMISSIONER WRIGHT WATERS His expression after Nicholson's shot against MTSU said it all CAN'T WAIT TO SEE YOU AWARD ULM Women's Basketball, FAU Women's Basketball, baseball and softball. TAKE YOUR TIME GETTING HERE AWARD FAU and ULM men's basketball, ULM Baseball (1-15) and softball (lost 12 of their last 13.) HONK IF YOU'RE HORN(y) AWARD Troy's band. Loud, proud and plenty of brass BEST BAND REPITOIRE--FLORIDA INTERNATIONAL Really good selections. Made me say "Oh wow" multiple times BEST DANCE TEAM--LOUISIANA'S RAGIN JAZZ Because I see them all the time, I take them for granted. But after seeing the others, this one isn't even close BEST LOOKING DANCE TEAM--FLORIDA INTERNATIONAL (Men's team dancer division) SECOND BEST LOOKING DANCE TEAM--FLORIDA INTERNATIONAL (Women's team dancer division) They have an A and a B team, I guess. Me gusto mucho las senoritas cubanas. BEST LOOKING CHEERLEADERS--WESTERN KENTUCKY I had to stand up and cheer. SPONTANEOUS COMBUSTION AWARD--KERMIT DAVIS--MIDDLE TENNESSEE I swear, sometimes I think the man is just going to explode, sending body parts all over the Murphy Center. IT'S ALL ABOUT MY GUYS AWARD--MULTIPLE WINNERS Darrin Horn nominated five players for all conference, Sergio Rouco four, Dickey Nutt three, UALR three. MISCELLANEOUS BEST POSTER ON A MESSAGE BOARD--MURPH--HILLTOPPER HAVEN Nice comeback for the former Worst Poster winner. He says just enough on the Haven to tick off a lot of the Havenites. That tells me he's doing something right. WORST POSTER ON A MESAAGE BOARD--UALR TIPSY CLUB So rude he isn't even funny. People were dying of meningitis in Louisiana and this moron was making jokes. Greatfully, disappeared when his team did down the stretch. BEST SIGN IN AN ARENA---FLORIDA INTERNATIONAL "Vandalay Industries--a Divison of Krameracorp" sign hangs in Phar-Med Arena. If you aren't a Seinfeld fan, you won't get it. SEINFELD FAN AWARD--FIU FANS Vandalay sign has been put up three times...the first two signs were stolen. BEST MASCOT--SOUTH-PAW AND MISS PAW-LA--SOUTH ALABAMA In a league with a flying jackass, a blood clot and Indians that do nothing, at least these two tell you that the team is the Jaguars. WORST MASCOT--CAYENNE--LOUISIANA Mascot was MIA at hoops games, reportedly because no one wanted to wear that ____ suit. SPORTSMANSHIP AWARD (PLAYER DIVISION)--ZACK WRIGHT--UALR For getting tossed out of the UALR-Bowling Green game SPORTSMANSHIP AWARD (ADMINISTRATOR DIVISION)--CHRIS PETERSON--UALR AD For getting tossed out of the UALR--Illinois game FIGHT SONG IN NEED OF A LYRIC FACELIFT--WESTERN KENTUCKY--STAND UP AND CHEER I mean, does anyone really refer to them as "Dear old Western??" BEST LYRIC FACELIFT FOR A FIGHT SONG--GET ME A BEER (STAND UP AND CHEER) Get me a beer It's nearly halftime and I'm thirsty Go get me a beer In an ice cold frosted mug (BUD-WEI-SER) Move your big rear Oh, will your yapping never cease Get out of here Get me a beer So I can watch the game in peace. (______) BEST QUOTE AT THE TOURNAMENT--DAN MCDONALD--LAFAYETTE DAILY ADVERTISER The normally soft spoken scribe and former UL SID said "If Kitus Witherspoon is a college basketball player, I'm a male wh0re." CORPORATE SIGNAGE AWARD--DIDDLE ARENA--BOWLING GREEN Has three different corporate logos on their court. We're waiting for the announcement that it's been renamed "Uncle Sam's" arena. WORST IMITATION OF A SELLOUT--UALR Refused to move their game with ASU to Alltel Arena, refused to give ASU tickets saying the game was a sellout at the new Stephens Center. Fell almost 1000 short of a sellout, effectively cutting off their nose to spite their face. CAN WE MOVE BACK TO ALLTEL AWARD--UALR Stole an extra conference home game from UL to get eight conference games in their new arena, and promptly went 2-6 at home in league games. MOST INTERESTING MOMENT OF SILENCE AWARD--LOUISIANA Before the womens' game vs. UALR, UL's Assistant Athletic Director ordered a moment of silence in memory of.....Don Knotts.......honest. BEST CHANGE IN THE CONFERENCE TOURNAMENT FORMAT Taking all men's quarterfinal games and moving them to Sunday so the teams and fans wouldn't be exposed to Saturday night in the Sun Belt officiating. NICE GUYS AWARD There are friendly people and fans all over the Sun Belt. I don't know if you'll ever find nicer folks than what you'll find in Troy Alabama. BIGGEST HEARTBREAK Driving from the Elysian Fields Exit on I-610 to the UNO campus. No people. No cars. No traffic lights. Just houses with high water marks on them, spray painted to indicate how many dead were found. Can (and did) make a grown man cry. BEST USE OF AN INFLATABLE DOLL--FLORIDA INTERNATIONAL The big blowup Golden Panther that the team runs through as they go onto the court. GET YOUR GOAT AWARD--WESTERN KENTUCKY Sorry guys. This is pretty funny. In Bowling Green, it's no longer "tastes like chicken." Now it's "feels like sheep." FOOD AWARDS Still love breakfast at Judy's Castle in Bowling Green, wings at Toots in Murfreesboro and Cuban food in Miami......but now add Elway's Steak House in Denver to the list.....not because of the steak, which is great, but I promise you'll never see more women with implants than you'll see at this new, trendy restaurant. BEST AWARDS--THE BIRDYS Admit it...you look forward to this more than the Oscars. The source of the Birdy PLAYERS awards The source of the Birdy TEAMS AND COACHES awards The source of the Birdy MISCELLANEOUS awards

[skankinCajun]

nice job.. there should have been a category for loudest fans at the tourney...bands included.

[CajunAmos]

Great job BOP, and I agree with the tears on Eleysian Fields.

[CajunCall]

This is good stuff and it made me hungry for more. Where can I get 1-9 and 11?